Tuesday, 30 December 2014

Tantalizing Tuesday - Hovering

Tuesday and 200 words. I am just one answering the challenge. Visit our Blog to read all the fantastic teasers out there.


A chill creeped into her legs. Moist dampness soaked into her thick woolen dress, making it heavy and dark. The light, filtered through mist and cloud, did little to alleviate the darkness. Muted as it was, she shivered, lacking the heat of the sun’s rays.
Creaking filled her ears, a sighing sag. Wood groaned as it held itself up, held her weight, tried to stand tall. And it did. The tree spread leafless branches over her head, like a skeleton, and she would be the tiny rodent hiding within.  
Snow hovered, not forming, not falling, not existing, just hovering on the verge of existence. At any moment, the scale might tip. If enough vapor got cold enough, it would fall. Until then, six fingered crystals waited, an infinitesimal distance from one another.
Her nose turned red and a thin stream began to run from it. She lifted her sleeve to wipe it away, but made a face in disgust when she saw the crusted area made over the last hour.

An hour. Would she freeze to death? Would she thaw? Would she become and fall? Or would she hover here forever, on her perch, the canary in a bone cage.

6 comments:

  1. Wow, this piece was pretty deep, especially at the end. Happy New Year's.

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  2. Such a deep teaser. I felt like I was up there. Your visuals are perfect as are all use of senses. Love it. Happy New Year Angelica

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  3. Haunting and beautiful. I don't know how you do it, Angelica but this was amazing!
    Have a wonder New Year!

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  4. Very ominous and haunting. Chilling, but beautiful, well done!

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  5. I do not know where to begin and were I to point out my favorite word phrases and images, I would just have to rewrite this piece exactly as written the first time. It is haunting, powerful, ominous, crushingly sad and foreboding. To me, you are describing the heart in a boned cage made of ribs, suspended in time, waiting-hoping-longing for love to banish the darkness with light and warmth. I fucking loved this piece. xo

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